Purge Negativity and Negative Automatic Thoughts
The value of verbal vomit to stop negativity and automatic negative thoughts
Everyone gets disappointed, frustrated, angry and fearful at times. When you get caught in this negativity, or in automatic negative thoughts, purge them quickly to make room for positive thoughts.
How? Do the verbal vomit. Verbal vomit helps eliminate your negative thoughts about daily stressors such as losing a big sale, getting caught in traffic, being late to an important appointment, catching your 17-year-old climbing out the window in the middle of the night or dealing with your dog who got a stomach bug and let loose from both ends. The goal of verbal vomit is to speak your negativity so you’re getting it out of yourself and not affecting others.
Here are the rules:
- Two people engage in a verbal vomit; one is the vomiter and the other is the encourager.
- The vomiter asks the encourager’s permission to verbally vomit for a specific length of time (such as five minutes) everything stressful that comes to mind.
- If the encourager agrees, then the encourager keeps track of time and lets the vomiter talk, without commenting or fixing. As the vomiter lets the negativity fly, the encourager says, “OK, what else?” (that’s all, nothing else).
- At the end of the designated time, the encourager says, “Time’s up.”
- Now, the vomiter must only speak positive thoughts and feelings.
A conversation could go something like this:
Vomiter: “I’m really ticked at my boss for not giving me a raise.
Encourager: “OK, what else.”
Vomiter: “I can’t believe our daughter’s flunking out of high school.”
Encourager: “OK, what else?’
Vomiter: “I was putting on eye liner in the car this morning and poked my eye; it really hurts.”
(and so on)
Encourager: “Time’s up.”
Vomiter: “Thanks for listening to my frustrations. I love you. I have a great life.”
Bonus. Guys, most women love to be listened to without us trying to fix them or the situation. Try the verbal vomit with your wife, significant other or even a teenage daughter. It’s a great way to listen and not fix.
If your negative thinking is the result of fear ,this audio training could really help you (Blast Through Fear).
In what situation could you use verbal vomit?
Next post: What’s the one negative thought/emotion that you should never verbalize?
In your corner,
